LOVE My Backseat Driver: BPM

“NO BYE, BYE,” he screams at me as I wrangle him into his car seat. The screams get louder, and I try to keep my cool. We are already running late {like usual} because a little redhead boy wanted to bring everything but the kitchen sink to school.

I slam the door shut, take a deep breath and make my way to the drivers seat.

The moment I sit down the demands start.

Does he really not understand that I’m the one that makes the car go, so I must have all my limbs strategically placed at 10 and 1 and not reaching in the backseat to grab books, plastic horses or blankies?

Obviously, not because this scenario plays out daily, like a scene from Groundhog Day.

As we make our way downtown, the sun glares through the window making my little passenger FREAK out and yell “Too bright. Too bright,” like little Gizmo from the Gremlins. Once we turn the sun is behind us and he begins babbling in a secret language that only other two year olds understand.

“garble snup scherch mama,” he says rather intensely. Looking to me for an affirmation, answer or intelligent response. I have nothing, so I smile and nod, and he gets angry repeating his phrase more emphatically. I use the mimic method and it seems to work, perhaps I do speak baby afterall.

Keep in mind I’m driving a good 40 mph while we engage in this witty repartee.

For a brief moment there’s silence and I take full advantage of it, turning the radio to hear some grown up voices. Suddenly I hear it, that song from hell “We’re Never ever, ever getting back…” quickly change it and just as quickly my backseat driver starts wailing. “No change it. No change it,” he wails. I’m torn wailing kid or annoying ear worm all day…wailing kid or annoying ear worn all day….

The wailing increases, and the song returns.

Peace has been restored.

He gallops his plastic horses across the windows. “Neigh, Neigh,” and he begins giggling and talking to himself.

At which point I quickly turn off the offending song, and he continues playing not noticing the lack of background music.

I breathe and smile. Settling in my seat, shoulders relaxed. We are making good time, and I’m hitting all the green stop lights.

EWOEWEOWOWOWEO!!!

SCREEEEEEECH….I slam on the breaks, and look in my rearview expecting to see a cop car with sirens glaring.

Instead I see a pint-sized redhead holding his brother’s toy police car {with realistic sounds}. After I grab my heart off the floorboards of the car, and place it back in my chest, I make a note to make that car “disappear.”

Just as my heart has reached its normal rhythm…”SQEEEEEEEEE!”

G screams, “Choo, Choo mama. Choo Choo!”

I affirm his observation by mimicking his words again.

“I hear ding, ding. Peas mama…peas,” he begs.

I drive the two blocks out of my way so we can sidle up the to railroad crossing at which point we stop, and I roll down his window. He’s oblivious to the freezing temperatures, as his full attention lies with the train speeding past.

We can’t linger for it’s rush hour and cars are backing up behind us.

As we turn onto the street for school, the tears begin {just like every morning} and my heart aches as he cries “no school mama, no school.”

His wails turn to whimpers as I park the car and we make our way into school. Mr. Independent won’t accept my help getting out of his cars eat, walking to the door, pushing the button for the door or walking to his classroom.

But…

Once in the classroom he won’t let me go, clutching tightly to my leg like a kitten to its mama.

I pry his arms from my legs, give him a big hug and send him to the cozy corner with his book.

He hesitates only for a moment then makes his way to the mound of pillows.

I make my way back to the car.

Slide into the seat and breathe.

The car once full of noises is now silent, peaceful, but also lifeless.

I miss my backseat driver, for as much as our morning journey can be full of ups and downs I LOVE our time together. Just me and my little red, cruising down the road ready for adventure.

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Each Thursday, we come together to celebrate living life with intention by capturing a glimmer of the bigger picture through a simple moment. Have you found yourself in such a moment lately? Share it with us!